sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
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