please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
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I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
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Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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