Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
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Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You may now shotgun with the bride
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
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You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
You left your phone here
Wait...
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