I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize