forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Enjoy the penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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