i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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