I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
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