I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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