May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This show inspires me to have sex in space
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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