What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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