If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
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He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
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I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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