I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
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Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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