I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Randomize