Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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