I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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