Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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