I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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