Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize