Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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