i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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