hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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