Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize