For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
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hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
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I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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