she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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