I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize