Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize