He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize