I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
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