Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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