ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
What drink are we having for lunch?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize