I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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