And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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