i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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