Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
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I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
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She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
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