I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize