Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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