I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize