He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
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I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
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If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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