I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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