quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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