Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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