Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize