It's Friday. Sex?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
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You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize