Can Purell be used as lube?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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