i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize