Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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