Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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