About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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