it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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