All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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